Archive for the ‘hahas’ Category

Santiago, Budapest

A conversation we overheard at lunch today, between two Singaporean tourists two tables away:

Girl A: So have you been to the biggest Santiago here?

Girl B: The biggest what?!

Girl A: Santiago. You know, like a Jewish church?

(a few moments)

Girl B: Oh! You mean a synagogue!!


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great fools

There is an apostolic injunction to suffer fools gladly. We always lay the stress on the word “suffer,” and interpret the passage as one urging resignation. It might be better, perhaps, to lay the stress upon the word “gladly,” and make our familiarity with fools a delight, and almost a dissipation. Nor is it necessary that our pleasure in fools (or at least in great and godlike fools) should be merely satiric or cruel. The great fool is he in whom we cannot tell which is the conscious and which the unconscious humour; we laugh with him and laugh at him at the same time.

An obvious instance is that of ordinary and happy marriage. A man and a woman cannot live together without having against each other a kind of everlasting joke. Each has discovered that the other is a fool, but a great fool. This largeness, this grossness and gorgeousness of folly is the thing which we all find about those with whom we are in intimate contact; and it is the one enduring basis of affection, and even of respect.


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big red riding hood

“Grandma! What big feet you have!”

“All the better to cover you with, my child!”

And with that, the Big Bad Weather jumped out of his grandma-clothes and consumed Big Red Riding Hood with the largest foot of snow she’d ever seen!

But a huntsman in the woods nearby heard Big Red Riding Hood’s cries for help, and rushed up the hill. There lay the Big Bad Weather, fast asleep. Hastily, he took his shovel, and began to shovel the snow off Big Red Riding Hood.

All through the night he shoveled, but the snow was so thick that when day came, it seemed he’d only dusted some snow off her head.

But Big Red Riding Hood knew that being devoured by the Big Bad Weather was no excuse to skip school. And so, after hibernating in the snow for an additional hour in the morning just for good measure, she thanked the huntsman, mustered all her strength, and dragged her reluctant student body to class.

And they all lived happily ever after. The End.

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When I was one-and-twenty
I heard a wise man say,
“Give crowns and pounds and guineas
But not your heart away;
Give pearls away and rubies
But keep your fancy free.” (more…)

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carnation milk

Carnation Milk is the best in the land;
Here I sit with a can in my hand –
No tits to pull, no hay to pitch,
You just punch a hole in the son of a bitch!

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The alliterated title of this post is not by me, but by the William Hung of the literary world (she’s so bad, she’s good!): Amanda McKittrick Ros, a writer so great, she counts J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis amongst her followers! Who cares if they read her works just so they can see who can do so for the longest without laughing? If you can’t be famous, be infamous; after all, it’s got more letters.

Here are a few quotes, and quotes about her quotes, as well as an expert diagnosis of her condition by Aldous Huxley:


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poor richard’s almanack

Happened to see a copy lying around. Browsing revealed some interesting quotes:


Being the choicest morsels of wisdom, written during the years of the Almanack’s publication, by that well-known savant, Dr. Benjamin Franklin of Philadelphia.


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